My kids go to a IB through-train school. Most of their local school friends envy them of not having much homework and exams. It is true that they have a great childhood by having IB PYP which focuses on nurturing children’s love for reading,
interest for learning and free exploration. However, life is not going to be
the same for MYP as there are more academic requirements from each subject.
Personally, I am pleased that they can go through such a
learning approach which is in line with children’s mental development. Kids can enjoy a happy learning life at
primary years while they are still developing their conceptual brain. As soon
as they're entering the teen years, they are ready to take up a more
challenging MYP curriculum. As Daniel
Siegel pointed out, “Adolescent period of life is in reality the one with
the most power for courage and creativity” (“Brainstorm– the power and purpose of the teenage brain”) He stressed that adolescent
is not a period to endure, but it is a critical phase for teens to thrive if
parents know how to harness the capacities during this important period. Transitioning
to secondary school is a golden opportunity for parents to begin shifting our
role and prepare to support our children for the spring of their courage and purpose.
My daughter is currently in Year 7. Earlier this month, I
volunteered with another parent to share with Year 5 parents on how we
supported our children during their transition to Year 6. The school ran a PYP
programme from Year 1 – Year 5, year 6-12 adopt MYP and DP programme. A series
of workshops were held for Year 5 parents to get prepared for the transition.
Compared to local schools, students here are a year earlier to move to
secondary section, it is great for parents to get ready earlier. So how parents
can support their children?
Change in School Life
“Self-management skills are key once the kids move to MYP.
No more fix classroom with two homeroom teachers. Different subjects are taught
by different teachers. Students are expected to manage their own time-table
every day by going to respective subject teacher’s classroom. They need to take
good care of their own lockers and arrange own lunch (no more pre-ordered
lunch), and go to their own school buses No more weekly homework grid, your
kids got to check their homework and assessment deadlines by visiting each
teacher’s weebly sites,” we shared.
“Self-control on the use of digital device is another
concern. Kids need to bring along their own MacBook to school every day. Most
parents will also buy kids smart phones for easy reach. All of a sudden, kids are having very easy
access to digital gadgets and it is a huge challenge for preteens to control
their own screen-time. Although the school will run a series of digital
citizenship campaign on “Dos” and “Don’ts” in the digital world, parents should
make thorough agreements with your kids on the use of screen time and proper
online behavior. Even adults can’t live without our phones, you can imagine how
hard for kids to resist? Don’t be upset if they are snap-chatting with their friends
all day long.
“Another huge difference is assessment. There is no formal
assessment in PYP with final scores. In MYP, each subject has assessment based
on four criteria. It is not assessed by a single examination but rather
assessed fully from each assignment, presentation, group projects, quizzes and
even general class attendance and attitude.
Even the student excels at a written exam, he can’t get a perfect score
if he is not working well with other kids or not showing good learning attitude
in class.
The above picture shows my daughter’s first term score in
“Individual & Society”, she got “6”
in Criteria A & D, but “7” in criteria B and C, and the final score is “6”
(“8” is the highest). Obviously, she realized that she is doing fine in
information gathering and assignments but still need to work hard in grasping
the subject matter and critical thinking. This assessment approach allows kids
to reflect on individual strength and weakness, instead of purely comparing on
a numeric score.”
We all agree that in Year 6, kids are given lots of freedom and
responsibilities at the same time. We can’t expect them to cope with it all at
once. For parents, we don’t need to be over anxious or simply let them have
their own way. The best approach is to make good use Year 6 in helping them to
adjust and grow, to be their cheerleader and coach alongside. Let them learn
their own necessary lessons through trial and errors. Like many mums, I tried my best to attend
parent workshops run by the school in Year 6 to understand each subject’s
criteria and curriculum, visit the teachers’ weebly sites to understand the teaching content. However, we tried not to
interrupt and let the kids handle by themselves.
Last year, my daughter told me in tears late at 11pm that
she missed doing an assignment for “Design & Technology” and it was too
late. I asked her what options she could made. Finally, she decided to send an
email to explain to the teacher and in the end the teacher allowed her to
submit later. Preteens brain for
planning is still immature, therefore time management is a big challenge. My
daughter used to estimate that she could finish an assignment in two hours but
turned out she spent the entire day. Don’t be panic, just take it easy. Tips is not to plan a packed weekend
or a full vacation during term break.
We don’t sit with them in doing homework because there is
simply no point. Lots of subject require reflective and analytical writing
instead of memorizing a model answer. Whenever I saw her work until late at
night, or had fights with friends on group projects, I simply said,
‘Mummy is available when you need help. Are there any
support you need from me?” Maybe she needed a hug or just your presence, or one
or two suggestions to rephrase her article. I respect her as a growing young
adult who is ready to take on life’s challenges. I am not worried she can’t get
full score in every subject, rather I am scared she needs my push to make every
move. At the end of Year 6, she achieved a fair score through all these trials
and errors. I am delighted that her little young mind is starting to build the
sense of accountability and motivation for learning.
After a year’s transition, when she moved to Year 7, I can
see my little girl thrived and her brain seems “click” all of a sudden. She
handled all her work very well. I realized I haven’t paid any visit to the
teachers’ weebly sites this year and had no idea when she’s having an
assessment. She is fully accountable for her own studies. She will ask me to
wake her up earlier to print an assignment. Without any private or external
tuition, my jaw dropped when she managed to attain an above-average score in
year 7 and full score in 4 subjects. I
truly see how teens can thrive naturally if we give them sufficient love and
support. Part of the reason is also because
she is a girl. Girls are much more mature than boys at this age. I still have a
son at Year 4 and I can’t imagine when he can have real “click”. Another mum
with a boy at Year 10 nodded knowingly, “My son just told me that he got to be
real serious this year,” (“On RaisingBoys” )
So no worries! “Building a good habit since young for self
accountability, maintaining a close relationship with your children, and start
to change your role at this transitional period are all crucial in getting
prepared to MYP,” concluded the vice principal.
“If we want the opportunity to mentor, guide, and support
our teenage children through this phase of their lives, we must alter – not abandon
– our parenting style. We must become parent-coaches.” Diana Sterling, Author of “The Parent As Coach Approach –The SevenWays to Coach Your Teen in the game of life” and early advocate of “Parent As
Coach”.
I believe each kid is able to thrive and live out his own
purpose of life if we can offer them a secure and loving environment from birth
and letting go as they enter each new phase of life.
Being hand-trained by Diana Sterling, I’ve started to share
her “parent as coach approach” to parents in Hong Kong, you can reach me for
more details if interested in “Loving the Teen Years!!!!” small group parenting
program.
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